I find it kind of interesting how within a few months, I have developed a bit of an aversion to mainstream erotica. I never liked it much in the first place, but now it actually kind of makes me shudder. I have just gotten so used to the stuff I've been involved with, which is all au naturel, and proud of it.
I only realised it now, when I was randomly directed on to the Australian Penthouse Aussie Babes Gallery. Sure, some of them still look reasonably nice, but many of the popular ones seem incredibly cheesy. It always makes me wonder. How did that become sexy? And I don't just mean things like Penthouse. I mean the straight out cheesy porn, too. It's not like say "Ooooh yeah, baby, your cock is so big" when I'm in the sack with a fellow, whilst clumsily groping my own boobs.
I wonder if it's as simple as the fact that mainstream porn is a primarily male-run infustry, fuelled by male fantasies. How many of these men who make mainstream porn have seen a genuinely vocal, enthusiastic woman in the sack? Do they even know what it's supposed to be like?
I suppose it's no wonder I get a kick out of having people witness the way I orgasm. It feels like I'm putting the word out there. And I know that few men are prepared for it when they first experience me coming. I have come to very much enjoy that wide-eyed, stunned, and ultimately gleeful expression on their faces. Many of them spend some time groping for words. My favourite reaction thus far actually came from Luke. The first time he experienced me having an orgasm, he looked at me in wide-eyed astonishment, and a big grin slowly spread over his face before he said, "Wow! Cool!"
So I can't help but think, surely the faked orgasms in mainstream porn can't be more interesting than a real woman mid-enthusiastic climax. It's certainly not for me. It's always going to be the latter that makes my heart pound, and I'm only vaguely bisexual, really.
I guess what I'm getting at is, maybe women should be less afraid to showcase their sexuality and be proud of it. Many women complain about how they hate porn, but I'm starting to think that perhaps the everyday woman does have the power to change the mainstream idea of what female beauty is. I just find myself shrugging at best, and cringing at worst when I see one of those stereotypical big-boobed, bare-pussied, bleach-blonde bunnies. But only recently, a masturbation video of a dreadlocked hippie girl with a fairly normal physique got my pulse racing. But yet many a woman tries to emulate the former, or at least looks to the big-boobed bunny for a standard in beauty, instead of the earthy hippie goddess.
Well, at the end of the day, I suppose it does still come down to taste.
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Hey sexy, I just had to add that I think some of the reason mainstream porn is so fake is that that's what people expect. It caters predominantly to a certain audience (porn enthusiasts!), and people like to get what they expect. So, unfortunately, somewhere along the line the idea that big-busted blondes moaning unconvincingly was sexy arose. People who liked that kind of thing bought more porn, and that encouraged porn producers to make more of it. It's stupidly unrealistic, but then, it's not much different from people eating white bread because they know it'll taste the way they expect, even though it's not as good for you as wholemeal.
A lot of guys here in Japan are surprised that I don't squeeze my eyes shut and squeal rhythmically as if I'm in pain and really upset while we're having sex. Every time I hear my neighbours going at it, it's the exact same noises from the girls - I often wonder where they learn it from, because I find it singularly unattractive and unpleasant, and so do a lot of the guys I've been with (or so they say, anyway). And then every time I see a small snippet of J-porn on the internet I'm like, "ohhh, THERE we go, I see now." I guess my point is that porn has a really huge influence on how people behave!
The sad thing is, I can totally picture that.
I, for one, would love to witness the way you orgasm ... besides being so lucky as to actually being next/on top of/underneath you/etc. would you ever consider posting it here? Or on beautiful agony, perhaps?
Love the site!
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