A shamedfaced admission.

Yesterday's orgasm count: two, self-inflicted.

Usually, I don't like to write entries that point to my home country, but I have to admit something here: The Biggest Loser has become something of a guilty pleasure for me. No, it has nothing to do with the hideously commercialised ways of bullying fat people into facing their demons in public and humiliating ways. It has everything to do with the sexy bitch that is Shannan Ponton, one of the trainers. Even though, if given the opportunity, I probably wouldn't screw him silly, I still purr and tingle every time I see him. He's my porn, at the moment, except that there's nothing overtly sexual about him on TBL. Not only do I drool over his obviously gorgeous physique -- he has the muscle balance just right -- but I also love his demeanor and range of facial expressions. Of course, he has that firecracker energy of a physically fit person -- always a very attractive thing to me -- but I also giggle girlishly whenever he gets tough and forces his fat trainees through vigorous work-outs. And, this is probably a very girlish thing for me to say... he has a beautiful smile.

But what really got me all atwitter today was that he took his shirt off on today's show. Oh, someone revive me! I do lament it when he wears something that covers his shoulders, and rejoice when he's in a singlet, but when he takes the thing clear off, I'm in Heaven. Oh, baby. Of course, there was plenty of lovely footage of his muscles rippling over that magnificent torso of his, but his nipples were also pronounced as all hell! They were sticking out like bullets, to steal The Girls's pet phrase, almost as if they were taunting me. When nipples like that are in my presence, they're just begging to be licked, fondled, pinched, and stroked. Oh, Shannan. It has made me a very happy woman tonight.

Shannan, if you ever happen to read this, I am sorry. I do not mean to objectify or embarrass you, and I love you for more than just your body. Own the fact that many a woman you will never meet has probably masturbated whilst thinking of your delightful nipples.

And now, I shall go assure my beloved that I still think he is the sexiest thing alive. :-) Sorry, Shannan, you've been usurped!